Here comes 2011

Things I learned in 2010:

1. Everything is more worth everything when you have a child/children.
2. The human body is ridiculously and miraculously resilient.
3. No matter how much you think you're convinced about something you've never experienced, once you experience it, your mind can change in a heartbeat.
4. Doesn't matter who you are, your moustache looks funny.
5. I could watch the Food Network and shows about interior design ALL DAY LONG.
6. There is a such thing as elevator etiquette. Most people don't really know that.
7. Organization is very important.
8. I thought I was forgetful. And then I became a mother. THEN, I became forgetful.
9. Some people show other sides when they're overly excited.
10. The rewards of parenting outweigh the challenges a million times to one. And I've only been a parent for less than a year.

2011 Resolutions

1. Use the phone more. I text and email too much.
2. Stop swearing.
3. Entertain more.
4. Go back to being anal about being clean and neat and organized.
5. Spend my time more wisely.

I hope 2011 is wonderful to you!

We're ONLINE.

FINALLY.

When Mr.S and I got married, our web-savvy friends designed a wedsite for us as our wedding gift. We came to them asking for some information about web design and they decided to do it for us. What great friends, eh? So anyway, when we first had the idea of a wedsite, we wanted to make sure that we could eventually turn it into our family website.

2.5 years later, and here we are.

It only took me 1.5 years to get it done. Holy cow. I had been working on the site for a while and only in recent months did I finally sit down and finish it. It only took so long in the past few months because the site had been a little glitchy...and I wanted to overload it with pictures (and when you check it out, you'll think I did, but just think, I wanted MORE!)

So yes, it's finally done. That URL on your Christmas card DOES go somewhere now.

D-nut's first Christmas

I can write now that I'm officially recovering from Christmas. Sorry, that sounds horrible. What I mean is, this year, Christmas was a whirlwind. It came and passed so quickly and while it did that, it sorta felt like it picked us up, span us around a bit, made us dizzy and then slowly let us down onto our feet to continue (what feels like) running through life. Don't get me wrong though; I loved it. While Christmas is so much more crazy with a child, it's also a million times better. And that feels like an understatement.

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Merry Christmas to all!!

How awesome...

...is this?

Is it vain of me to say...

...that he is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO cute?

The Holidays, as a mother

2010 has totally changed my perspective of holidays. As a mother now, I've been finding that my thoughts are a quite bit different than they've been every other year. It's kinda strange, but interesting, because it's a whole new take on things, almost like I've been given a completely new set of eyes.

For example, Mother's Day, the easiest to explain. Up until this year, I've been celebrating my mothers (biological, step, grand, in-law, god, you name it), my sisters, my aunts, and all the mothers I know and love. This year, we celebrated, well, me! Hallowe'en was so much more about how we're gonna get our child from house to house instead of accompanying our nephews and nieces on their trick-or-treating adventures.

But the holy days holidays are the ones where I find myself really thinking about things. Easter, well, Easter was really emotional. Good Friday was a doozy. I found myself thinking about the suffering, death and resurrection of our Lord, Jesus, but from the perspective of his mother, Mary. I'm just gonna stop there before I turn into a huge mess again.

And now, Christmas is coming. Not only am I not as concerned with Christmas shopping and getting stuck in the tornado that this time of year can bring, but I'm taking more time to prepare and stepping back to just enjoy the season. And, again, I've been thinking about Mary and what this time was like for her. I'm brought back to the days before D-nut was born and remember what it was like to feel the need to prepare for my son's arrival. Imagine that, but at the same time, preparing for your son, the Saviour, and his arrival. Talk about pressure! And the people at the inn don't even have any room for you. How dare they! And here I was getting ticked at the people on the subway who wouldn't give up their seat. Suddenly things don't seem as crazy or as petty as they first appeared to be.

I hope this season is bringing you much hope and joy and that your preparations are going well.

Thankful

I've filled up my iPod with Christmas songs. It's the most diverse compilation of artists, many of them singing the same song as the next. It's great. I especially love the original ones. Not everyone can sing along with them, but sometimes it's nice to just listen. I've been hooking up my iPod in the car and at home. I haven't listened to the radio for days. Yesterday we didn't even turn on the TV. We just listened to Christmas music, finished "decking the halls" and went about our business at home. It was so nice.

A few days ago, I took a quick drive to a store to pick up a Christmas gift. Brother watched D-nut while I went out and I heard one new Christmas song just as I was driving home. This one was from Josh Grobin's Christmas album. Since I was only two minutes (literally) from home, I ended up sitting in the car in the garage to finish the song. I think it's my favourite this year. It's called, "Thankful".

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We miss you/Welcome, Sophie!

Sophie is my son's giraffe. You may have heard of her. She's a rubber, squeaky giraffe for babies to chew on, slobber on, suck on... She sells for a pretty penny too. D-nut got her as a gift and has since developed a huge love of giraffes. You should see his eyes when he sees them at toy stores and such. I don't know what we're gonna do when he makes his first trip to the zoo and sees a real one. Hopefully he doesn't try to run up to it and eat it.

Anyway, Sophie.

Sophie is D-nut's security blanket when he's in his car seat and when we're out. Sometimes even at home too. She's really done a number on him. And he's really done a number on her. She's a very loved toy and you can tell it too just by looking at her...

...if you can find her.

:(

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So I had my first latte...

...ever.

I know.

I'm not a huge coffee drinker. When I do have coffee, it's decaf. Yes, I'm one of those people who gets a large decaf, double-double. I drink coffee because sometimes I crave how it tastes. I don't drink it to stay awake. I'd say I'm more of a tea drinker but even then I don't drink a lot of tea and even with tea I only drink decaffeinated teas.

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Got books?

Have you read more than 6 of these books? The BBC believes most people will have read only 6 of the 100 books listed here.

Instructions: Copy this into your NOTES. Bold those books you've read in their entirety, italicize the ones you started but didn't finish or read an excerpt.

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Rabbit Hole

As much as I want to see this movie, I don't know if I could...

Last Friday...

...I had a girls night in with some girlfriends. It was so nice.

I headed out after we fed D-nut and put him to sleep. I think I was so excited to be out on a Friday night that I drove in the wrong direction and ended up taking a route that was a bit longer than necessary. Anyway, it was really nice to be hanging out with the girls. I haven't spent time with them in a long time, and usually when we do get together, it's with the guys, our significant others.

We ate, talked, did our nails, curled hair, and all while Christmas music played in the background. It was a very nice, low-key Friday night. I'm so happy I went instead of falling asleep on the couch, my usual Friday night.

Elfed

'Tis the season!!! Enjoy!

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Books I must read...

...when I'm done breastfeeding. Just kidding.

By Rainn Wilson. That's enough to make me want to read it.

But really, he was on Rachael Ray's show today (I feel like all I do is watch TV in baby-excrement-soiled clothes all day) and talked a bit about what the book is about. It's got things like lists of things to try, like a reverse pickpocket, where you slip something nice in a stranger's pocket or bag. Or something like buying coffee for you and the person behind you in line at Starbucks. It has a bunch of other things in it too, but it just seems like a really good book to have.

Not to mention, it's an easy read. Easy, as in, you don't have to sit there and go through every single page. I don't have all the time in the world these days...which is why I'm still on page 3 of the first book of the Harry Potter series. :S

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Strike a pose!

D-nut had his first "photo shoot" a few weeks ago for Hallowe'en. It was something we decided to do spontaneously and just for fun. We were so glad we did because it was such a funny experience.

D-nut, being a struggling and lazy sitter-upper at the time, made the photographer laugh, and of course, we did too. He didn't cry (he seems to do well in situations where you'd think he'd cry!) even though we had to wake him from his nap for the shoot. Luckily, the session wasn't very long because by the end of it, he was sprawled on the chair he was sitting on (think: drunk and about to pass out), sucking on his fingers, staring at us from inside his Hallowe'en costume, with an expression that said, "Are you done having your fun yet?!" I wish I had a picture of that pose. Anyway, here's what we got:

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TMI

It is VERY easy to find information these days. What do they call it again? The Information Age? Or something like that? Well yeah, you can find information an almost anything. It's so easy. At the same time, it's so easy for people to provide information. So easy, that there is almost too much information.

Think about it.

Does the world really need to know that so-and-so is wondering what colour to paint her nails today? Or that this-person has the worst hangover he's ever had? Do I need to know that he was there at that time? Do you need to know that they broke up but are back together for the fifth time this week?

No. No. No. Annnnnnd. No.

I'm not saying I'm not guilty of it. I am sometimes. I update my status on Facebook almost every time I sign in. Most of the time it's something silly or useless, and no, no one really needs to know what it's about, but I just find it fun to share. Kinda like how I write a post on my blog. No one needs to read it, but I enjoy writing. Also, it's for a select group of people who I know will be interested in reading it. So, as long as there's an audience, I think it's fine to share information.

But what if there's no audience? Or what if no one cares? Or what if the information being shared shouldn't really be shared? What then?

Too. Much. Information.

Lobster

Siblings with kids and we went to the Raptors Fan Jam a few weekends ago. It was so fun to be on an outing with my sibs and their kids and be there with Mr.S and our kid. I didn't even pay attention to what the Raptors were doing. We were more focussed on each other and getting the attention of one or any of the Raptors Dance Pack. ;)

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When I'm done breastfeeding...

I know, I keep talking about stuff I'm gonna do when I'm done breastfeeding (mostly eat nuts), but I have another.

I'm on a total accessory-tip. It's horrible (but not). When we go to the mall and I enter a store, I make a beeline for the accessories. I'm not sure why this is and when it started. Maybe when I started blowing up when I was preggers and didn't have any interest in looking at clothes I couldn't wear, who knows? But yeah, I've been spending my allowance on pretty little rings, simple necklaces, cute earrings and even charming bracelets...and I'm not even a bracelet person. Or well, now I am. And so, because of this expanding collection of accessories, I've been doing some binging (is that the gerund form of "binge"? It looks funny.) and have rediscovered my collection of belts.

When I'm done breastfeeding, I'm going to reconcile with my belts. It's too hard to wear belts these days, in the style that they're used right now (i.e. on TOP of your clothes). Wearing a belt means that when I have to feed, I have to either take OFF my belt or pull my clothes out of my belt and then tuck them back in after feeding. This also applies to if I decide to tuck in my shirt. Or if I'm wearing a dress (that isn't strapless). It's just too much of a hassle to wear a belt...or a tucked in shirt...or a dress.

Dang, when I'm done breastfeeding, I'm gonna have so much more to wear!!

They're back

I am like a toilet

Every morning, as part of D-nut's daily routine, he sits on my lap while I catch up on emails and such. This is after he urges me to wake up, we play in bed for a bit, after I wash his bumbum from overnight pee and then after we figure out what he's gonna wear for the day.

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The Best Thing About Me Is You

Freckles

I'm not sure if you've noticed, but I'm one of those Asians with freckles. A few of my siblings also have freckles, and that also means a few of my siblings do not. I'm not sure why that is. Anyway, since I was pregnant, I noticed that my freckles had appeared more visible. One of my friends first pointed it out and she didn't even know that I had freckles before that. My freckles must have, along with other parts of my body, gotten more pigmented during my pregnancy.

Now, I still notice them more than before. Instead of seeing my nose first, which is what would happen when I'd see pictures of me when I was preggers, I see my freckles first. Is it just me or are they darker and more noticeable? Or is my skin getting lighter and they're just staying the same colour?

Then I saw her face...now I'm a BELIEBER

(Mr.S sent these to me...we found them quite amusing. I'm not hating, I just find them funny. I actually enjoy his music... ... ... BABY BABY BABY OHHHHHH!!!!)

Memory Lane...

We have a whole bunch of friends who are tying the knot next year. It has been kinda nostalgic to me to hear them talk about their wedding plans, looking at their wedding sites, etc. And you know, I love weddings. Sometimes I wish we could go back 2+ years and relive the whole thing. It was so fun to plan and stuff, even though most of it was pretty much done right after we got engaged.

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Date Night

Mr. S and I had another date night last week. We had to delay it a few times because D-nut had his first fever (and we were just as you would expect first-time parents with a 7-month old with a fever would be -- confused and worried), but everything was fine after a day or two.

Our night was quite adventurous, so much fun, filling and of course, hilarious. I took some pictures of our night out.

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Like Father, Like Son

Mr.S eyeing Wolverine claws at Winners

D-nut eyeing Wolverine claws at Winners

Sporting matching Toronto Raptors tees

(not pictured: me, jealous)

Please, don't let me go broke:

One of the main reasons why I go to Costco:

"It only has to happen once."

I have this thing now, where I don't take chances on certain things. If it's something that you can't say "I'll do ___ next time instead", it goes in the "It only has to happen once" category. It would almost always apply to things that are dangerous, risky, stupid... Basically it only has to happen once for you to learn your lesson, and by then, it's too late, or it shouldn't have had to happen for you to learn it.

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Hmmm...revisited

Fashion Victim?

Every season when there are new looks springing here and there, I find myself wondering if they're a Do or Don't for me. I'm short and on a budget, not that if I was tall and had money that I'd just go out and splurge on anything and everything of the latest craze. In order to help me save money, save sanity and save me from looking like an idiot, I usually gauge if I think the latest trends are silly, if they're okay but not for me, if they're okay for now, or if they're okay long-term. If they're okay for now and I like them, I'll look for a thrifty version, that way, they last me as long as they should, and by the time they're worn out, it's okay because they'll be out of fashion too! If they're good for long-term, I'm okay with spending a little bit more, as long as it's reasonable. There are times though when I change my mind about a Don't after a little bit of exposure.

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Hmmm...

Do you think Paul Reubens ever gets tired of being Pee Wee Herman? I mean, he's closing in on 60 and has been playing this character for almost 30 years.

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When you write your Personals ad...

If you're looking for a partner who's a keeper, and you're thinking long-term, as in "I'm-gonna-marry-him/her-and-have-his/her-children" long-term, here's something I realized would be very important, if you're someone like me.

Make sure your partner is not only okay with getting their hands dirty, but getting them dirty with your child/children's poo.

He/she must be able to quickly jump out of bed with you at 7AM on a Saturday morning, subjecting him/herself to high blood pressure to match yours, when your baby has taken a massive dump and it is slowly seeping out of the diaper, threatening to ruin your child's PJs and your sheets, first thing in the morning.

He/she has to be willing to either help you wash your baby's bottom, get the bath ready or attempt to undo the stains that your baby's clothes are being subjected to with detergent and hot hot water.

And through all this, he/she must be able to laugh with you about it, share your disgust and disbelief simultaneously at this crazy bowel movement, all the while staying focussed on the task at hand.

VERY important.

Tis the season...

...for lots of scary movies to come out, with lots of commercials on TV that make me hide behind pillows, sing really loudly AT D-nut and close my eyes forcing me to my happy place.

I'm not good at scary movies anymore.

The Goddaughter

It's very easy to love my Goddaughter.

She's one of those people who remind you of the person you wish you were when you were her age. She's good-natured, confident and comfortable with who she is. You can tell this just by talking to her. She's so easy to talk to too. She doesn't do that awkward "this is how I talk to adults" thing that I used to do.

When she was a baby, she was very easy-going and fun to play with, like most babies. But she continues to be the same way today. She has a fun sense of humour and so you can joke around with her like she's still a kid or like she's an adult. She's growing up so quickly, it's scary. But, I find myself enjoying watching her get older, and taller and taller than me.

She's such a good person, and she's still so young. She's like a breath of fresh air. I think she's growing up to be one of those people that people will look at and say, "There should be more like her..." One of the things I admire about her is that she's not afraid to say when something is wrong. She knows what's right and what's good. And so, she's very respectful. But, she's not afraid of you.

She's also a beautiful dancer. I missed her recital this year, but I'm sure she's gotten even better since I last saw her dance. Oh, the last time I saw her dance (not including that time I watched her perform "Beat It"). It was such a pleasure to watch her leap in the air with such grace, and even act a bit. So cute. Speaking of cute, she has this dimple at the top of her cheek. I think whenever she smiles, it'll always make me remember her smile when she was a teeny, practically bald baby.

I'm so happy about the person she's becoming. My sister and brother-in-law are doing such a great job raising her. She's such a mature young woman, and I'm so proud to call her my Goddaughter.

People I Love

So I mentioned before that I was thinking of doing a People I Love series. I decided I'd go ahead with it, but instead of it being a series, I'd just post every so often and use a People I Love tag. I know me, and I know that I'm not capable of writing about people I love consecutively and then stop My thoughts are all over the place and I'm bound to write about something else between People I Love posts.

Also, I decided to keep with my blog rules and use no names.

So, I begin...

Dream kitchen

Other than the obvious stuff I'd like in my dream kitchen (they are obvious, right?), I'd also like some bright, pretty casseroles and dishes. Just like healthy food, I'd like bright colours surrounding me and I think food looks good when there are bright colours associated with it. (But food also looks best when plated on a clean, white dish. I know, that's sorta contradictory, but we have a TON of white dishes, so I'm not writing about those.)

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See you later!

D-nut fell off the bed a few nights ago. Actually, it was at around 4ish in the morning. The whole thing started and ended in a span of, maybe, 5 minutes, "start" being the rolling around and kicking, "end" being falling back asleep. (In the middle was some frantic yelling, crying and rocking. BTW, I'm totally downplaying this whole thing. I felt like a mess.)

Mr.S and I decided that this meant we needed to move D-nut to the middle of the bed, i.e. between the two of us. He had been sleeping at the end of the bed, beside me, because Mr.S was worried about rolling over him, but now that he's adjusted and since D-nut is bigger, we don't feel it'll be a problem.

And so, Mr.S and I said goodbye to each other.

"See you in 10 years or so."

He frowned. I laughed.

We figure that 10 years from now, maybe we will have successfully evicted our children from our bed.

A mother's unconditional love

Every mother knows what it means to love her child unconditionally. The child can do no wrong, especially when they don't know better. The following is a true story that confirms the unconditional love I have for my son. Mothers, you will understand, and who knows, maybe you have a version of this story yourselves. Mothers-to-be, near and far, now or later, read this and be sure that you brace yourselves for such moments. They'll go down in your history books that you'll one day go over with your children when they're older and your grandchildren too. Here goes...

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Bye bye poop

D-nut started solids last week. (I just realized how old he sounds after typing that sentence. *tear*). I was warned: his poop's gonna change.

Today is the day.

We started giving him more of the rice and making it a little bit thicker. Then he pooped today and while it did have traces of his younger poo, it looked more grown up. And smelled more grown up too.

Darn it.

Refreshed

Our day so far

We have a hectic day ahead of us. D-nut woke up early and didn't go back to sleep after Mr.S went to work. So, we're watching Grey's Anatomy since Thursday nights go to the majority and we watch The Office instead, which I really don't mind. I love that show. There isn't an episode I haven't seen. Anyway, this morning, we're watching Grey's.

I guess that's all it takes to get him to sleep!

TEAM TINI day at HOLLYWOOD GELATO!

We’d like to invite you to support Team Tini, a team we put together in honour of our mother, for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society of Canada’s annual Light The Night walk.

This Saturday, September 25, we are partnering with Hollywood Gelato, who has THE BEST GELATO IN TOWN (we’re not kidding – Toronto Life says so, and we agree! See for yourself!). From 1PM to 5PM a portion of the proceeds from all sales will go towards supporting the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society of Canada.

Please drop by if you’re free, bring some friends, have a scoop (or two…or three!) and treat yourself and someone living with blood cancer at the same time.

Thank you, as always, for all your love and support over the years! We hope to see you there!

Love,
Team Tini

Hollywood Gelato
Team Tini
Light The Night
Visit our Facebook page

Blog series?

One of my fave bloggers will be starting a series on women she loves and so the thought resurfaced today...

I've been thinking for a few months about starting a blog series about people I love.

Each post would be about someone in my life whom I love (and if I don't write about you, it doesn't mean I don't love you). I think it'd make that person feel good to read about themselves and how I feel about them, while letting me express myself in ways I rarely would in person (I'm working on it). But, I'm not sure if there are people who would prefer not to be mentioned on my blog. Should I contact them first and say "I'm planning to write about you. Is that okay?" Because if I do that, it eliminates the element of (sort of-)surprise. Complements are always better when unexpected, right?

Okay, I think I've decided...stay tuned.

Check It Out!

So I have a new show to add to my favourites list. Check out Check It Out! I get so excited on Monday nights at 9PM. The first time I saw it, I laughed for the entire 15 minutes of commercial-free show. Literally. I was having trouble breathing and my stomach muscles ached and cramped all at the same time. I've only seen 2 episodes and I'm tempted to watch the rest on YouTube but I don't wanna spoil Monday nights at 9PM.

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Mr.S and Lolo

I love hearing Mr.S talk about his grandfather, his Lolo. There's a fondness in his voice when he speaks of him. It isn't very often, but when he does say something about him, like when he's reminded of something that was his Lolo's favourite or something his Lolo used to say, you can tell he really loves and misses him.

Mr.S and his grandfather were pretty close, from what I can remember. When we first started dating, and I'd call him up to talk about stuff (nothing important, of course...we were 16!), I'd ask what he's doing and he'd often say "Watching TV with my Lolo." Sometimes he'd say he'd call me back, sometimes he'd chat. I wasn't offended when he chose TV with his grandfather over talking to his girlfriend. He told me early on that he felt that he wanted to spend as much time with his grandparents as he could because he wasn't sure how long he'd get to spend with them. I admired that -- my Lolo passed away when I was 6 and I wished I could have spent more time with him.

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What's cookin'?

I've been cooking nearly every day for the past few weeks. I don't know what happened. I'm not complaining, AT ALL.

I would usually try to cook as often as I could but many times, after a few weeks, I would feel tired of cooking and then we'd get on a take-out/delivery/frozen-food tip. It's horrible. And then, D-nut was born and lack of time and energy put us on that tip for a lllllong time. Just think: I didn't have sinigang for 4 months. And I was okay with that.

And then, finally, all that watching the Food Network got to me. And now, all I want to do is cook. FINALLY. I find myself thinking about what I want to cook several times a day. I know what I'm going to be cooking for all of next week.

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Ooze

I don't know if I've ever posted about this.

I have OOZE issues.

I wouldn't say I'm a picky eater, but this post might make me sound like I'm a picky eater in denial. I don't like to eat anything that oozes. Seriously. It sounds gross, and maybe you don't know what I'm talking about, so I'm going to list some foods I don't eat. Oh, and by "ooze", I mean stuff that oozes out of food when you bite into it. Not like a burrito or something.

Some foods that ooze that I won't eat:

• Gushers - I think this fruit snack might be what started it all.
• Passion Flakies
• Jos. Louis
• Profiteroles
• Jelly donuts
• Halls Centres
• Twinkies
• Lava cake

Things that ooze that I will eat:

• Grape tomatoes
• Patties
• Running gels

It's coming!!

I'm so excited!!

What's in your bag?

I got the idea for this post from Shai. Thanks!

So, about my bag. I'm a Just-In-Case/You-Never-Know packer. I always try to pack as much as I can in my bag because you really do never know if you or someone you're with will need this or that. And, I have something against space in my bag, apparently.

As a result, my bag is always heavy. The Aussie (i.e. my sister; those of you who know her will sorta get the reference) used to say that I'm so short because my backpack in elementary school was so heavy, it stunted my growth. I wouldn't be surprised if she's right. My Dad offers to carry my bag every so often and briefly lectures me every time about why I shouldn't carry so much around. Brother and Mr.S ask me what's in my bag and I always respond, "my life".

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Back to school randomosities

Yes, it's a word. I said so.

Like many kids on a day like today, my mind is all over the place. I thought I'd jot some of these thoughts down for fun.

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Going NUTTY

I MISS NUTS.

I'm going crazy.

I'm avoiding nuts since I'm breastfeeding, just as a precaution, so that D-nut doesn't develop nut allergies. (Same story for shellfish. I want mussels and oysters like never before, and I don't even really eat oysters, but just knowing I can't have'em upsets me. Red Lobster, I'm mad at you for your succulent commercials. P.S. I wanna make my clam chowder and eat a big bowl of it too.)

It's so hard settling for ice creams and gelatos without nuts, especially when may faves are BR's Jamocha Almond Fudge, as you know, and Hollywood Gelato's Rocky Rochet and Hazelnut. (I'm salivating so much, I need D-nut's washcloth right now.) Thai food isn't the same either. We ask for no nuts and they look at us like we're idiots.

And then I got this email.

DAMNIT!!!

A few of my favourite things about spending my days with D-nut

♥ When he notices that I've been watching him eat and he smiles at me...and then goes back to eating

♥ When he wakes up smiling

♥ When he stretches

♥ When his eyes tell me he's learning something

♥ Drool, dripping from his luscious lips

♥ When he dreams he's eating and his mouth mimics eating motions

♥ Giggles

♥ Story time (i.e. when he sounds like he's trying to tell me a story)

♥ Random farts and snorts

Momma and Poppa's night out

When it was just the two of us, Mr.S and I said that when we have kids, we'd still try to go out on dates, just the two of us. Last night was our "first date". When Mr.S left in the morning, he jokingly said, "I'll see you later at our hot date!" Hahaha! And then when it came time to say bye to D-nut, he took a little bit longer than usual, adding, "Awwww, I'm gonna miss you!!!" because we were meeting straight after he finished work, so he wouldn't see D-nut until we picked him up from his parents' house.

Mom and Dad S babysat D-nut last night. I was really excited for them since they have been offering to babysit for a while and they're among the many people who ooooooze love when they're with D-nut. That made leaving D-nut a little bit easier. As per Mr.S' suggestion, I brought PLENTY of toys so Mom and Dad would have a ton of things to give him in case Mr. Crankster came out. (BTW, Mr. Crankster's gone on vacation for a few days, it seems, and my ear drums have stopped BLEEDING. D-nut seems to love his new teething toys. Thank goodness for those!)

I drove over to the theater/mall and it was SOOOO weird not parking in a family parking spot, not taking D-nut's car seat and stroller out of the back, not wheeling him inside. I was so disoriented when I got in because I wasn't pushing a stroller.

And then I wanted to cry. What if something happens to us while we're out? UGH, I MISS HIM!!!

And then I felt like a bad mother.

And then I felt my agoraphobia setting in...

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Inception

FINALLY watched it. Watch it. You will be successfully (as Mr.S and I could only describe it) mindf*cked.

*More on this experience coming up.

I have a huge crush on this guy

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Screaming

I'm getting used to the sound. D-nut is teething and is pretty much inconsolable unless my nipple is in his mouth. It hurts. And his gums probably do too.

The set that keeps on giving!

So as indicated in an earlier photo post, we bought the Lost series box set. It comes with a "torch", which is actually a black light. Today I was going through the set again wondering what this black light was for. I figured if it was just a light, it'd be an LED light or something, but this is LOST we're talking about, so it must be a black light for a reason. So, I looked at all the surfaces of the contents of the set to uncover some sort of mystery...

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More LOVE!!!

CONGRATULATIONS to one of the most serendipitous couples I know! Thank you for giving us another wedding in 2011! WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Shai ♥ Armin

I might not post for a while...

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New Glam Wardrobe II

Crap, I just realized I have two duck bill clips in my hair too!!!!!!!

New Glam Wardrobe

You know how some people, when they start a new job, they get new work clothes? Well, I did too...

But they're more "pambahay" (home clothes), which mostly consist of old t-shirts, belonging both to me and my husband (previously), and boxers. Basically, they're clothes I'm ashamed to answer the door with. (My neighbour came by quickly to see how D-nut was doing and to drop off mail that was in her mailbox. How embarrassing!!)

A Midsummer Night's Run

I finished my first postpartum race last week. See how I did. It was a very humbling learning experience.

I Don't Like Cleaning

SAY WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?!?!

Yes, I realized one day while in deep thought and tackling a mountain of dishes that it's not cleaning itself that I like. Mr.S can probably testify to this. He does most of the tidying around the house, not me.

I don't like small messes. I like BIG messes. When our house is a mess, it's because there's little messes around the house, and because the mess is spread out, it seems like it's not that messy, so I don't feel as motivated to clean up. But this doesn't mean that I prefer things to get completely out of hand before I decide to tackle something.

Mr.S is really good at putting things in their places and finding places for things (when he's in a cleaning mood...otherwise, he's the one who made the little messes (just kidding, Mr.S). You should see how he places things in his manpurses/murses. It's like each little pocket in those things was put there specifically for the item he placed in it. Imagine that, but with stuff. He just finds places to put things and it works out. I enjoy when he reorganizes rooms. I think he could do wonders with my purse/bag (more on that soon).

ANYWAY, enough about him (haha).

I like making order out of chaos. THAT is what I like.

I like washing dishes better when there's a lot of them. I like folding large amounts of laundry. I like putting away groceries after a big trip to the store. I like ironing numerous pieces of clothing.

I like how the dishes look so nicely organized when drying on the rack. I like the neat piles of folded clothing, ready to be put back in their respective drawers and on shelves and hangers. I like replenishing the fridge and cupboards. I like how wrinkle-free clothing looks hanging in the closet.

What I do like actually cleaning is the bathroom. I love cleaning the bathroom. I love a clean bathroom. I love the smell of a clean bathroom. I love the shine!

I think I'm gonna go clean the bathroom...

Grammar Nazi: Then and Now

I grew up in a family that immigrated from the Philippines in the 70s. My parents did not speak to me in Tagalog, so I never really learned how to speak it, nor fully understand it. Maybe they thought it would impair my grasp of the English language, I don't know.

But something I do know is that starting from when my siblings and I were young, Dad insisted that we speak with proper grammar. When we'd speak, he'd correct us if we made grammar errors.

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What his sister(s) will envy about him...

...IF she doesn't get these...

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Breastfeeding

(I wrote this post back in May and forgot to publish it!)

Someone out there should write a book called "The Truth About Breastfeeding", and it should sell as many copies as "What to Expect When You're Expecting", and should be written in a very sarcastic but blunt manner.

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Crentist

(If you don't get the title of this post, it's because you don't watch The Office. Here, educate yourself.)

I've said before how much I love going to my dentist. I can't find the post, so I'll just quickly explain why -- we get a massage chair, shades to keep the blinding bright light and flying bits of tartar out of our eyes, an AWESOME x-ray machine, hygienists who get to wear golf shirts, a chatty dentist, a play area for kids, a nursing area for moms, a fridge in the waiting area for thirsty patients, and a bunch of other stuff that I can't remember. At the same time though, I'm not sure if I'm so amazed by my dentist's technology because I came from a ghetto-ish dentist before.

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Multi-tasking Me

What do you call a person who can do things with both hands and both feet? Polydextrous? Anyway, I'm learning to be that.

I'm becoming more and more skilled at typing with one hand and typing with my toes. My feet are clean, as is my keyboard, I promise.

There's so much to do and sometimes when I'm feeding, it's a prime opportunity to get some online banking done or something.

This doesn't make me a neglectful mother, right?

Her name was Lola

Lola's body was laid to rest on Tuesday. Her granddaughters helped to bring her there. Literally.

It's not in my memories of Lola that she encouraged her granddaughters to go against the grain or to go out of their way to do things differently from everyone else, but it is in my memory that she helped raise us all to be strong women. And I think in being strong women, we've found that we don't have to go with the grain or conform.

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Mr. and Mrs. H

Congratulations to one of my most cherished friends and her husband, one of my favourite ex-co-workers!

It was an amazing day and a wonderful experience, witnessing you, after all these years, coming together as one. We wish you all the joy and happiness times a million that you give to all those you love.

2 years

At the end of a fairy tale, there's always "...and they lived happily ever after." Usually it's just following the part where the prince saves the princess and they get married. I like to think that I got my happily ever after when we got married. It sounds cheesy, but it feels like happily ever after.

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Lola

Lola & me on my 18th birthday

It's bittersweet. Most times, when someone you love passes, it's just bitter. In Lola's case, there's a sort of sweetness to it. Let me explain.

My sister wrote recently about her feelings about Lola passing away. I couldn't have said it all better myself. In many ways, Lola has been gone for a while. Her mind and body slowly diminished over the years and it became increasingly challenging to get her back when we came to visit her. I found myself saying Goodbye every time we'd leave her bedside. It wasn't just "Goodbye, see you next time". It was more like, "Goodbye, it's okay." I've been saying goodbye like that for a long time.

I think if I had a nickel for every time Lola would say "maybe this is the last time...", I would be pretty well-off. She said it a lot and she said it for YEARS. So much so, we would crack jokes about it. We would sometimes wonder if she'd end up being the oldest person in the world, or if maybe she secretly had immortality on her mind. Before last year, we would wonder about what it'd be like if Lola made it to 100...and then last year, she did. Wow, to know someone 100 years old or older. That's pretty cool.

I used to wonder if Lola would live to see my wedding day or if she'd get to meet the great-grandchildren I'd give her. Turns out the answer was yes to both. She wasn't able to make it to my wedding because she was already bedridden at the time, but she did get to meet Mr.S at my 18th birthday and saw him over the years (sometimes confusing him for my brother -- how embarrassing!) . She did get to meet D-nut, although I'm not sure she realized he was my son. She was probably wondering what year it was and how I could possibly already have a child.

Lola and D-nut, her 17th great grandchild

(we played with her hair and forgot to fix it)

Lola is quite possibly the strongest woman I know. It's a little faded, but I remember her at certain times in the year (1988) she lost her daughter (my Mom) and her husband (my Lolo). Even though I was still young, I remember wondering how she could survive something like that. I wondered that for many years after too. And then I found out she and my Lolo had other children that they lost when they were very young. They had eight kids.

Then she had eleven grandchildren.

On Lola's 90somethingth birthday

Then she had seventeen great grandchildren.

And so my Lola returns to our Heavenly Father, her husband and six of her children, among more family and friends. Quite a homecoming.

Thank you so much, Lola. I love you and miss you and look forward to seeing you again.

Goodbye, for now.

Venancia G.V.

September 17, 1909 - July 10, 2010

Oh well

A few days ago after putting D-nut down for a nap, I went to the kitchen to wash some dishes. While washing, I had an itch on my cheek and because my hands were wet, I went to scratch my face and turned it to my shoulder. Then I found it:

A BOOGER ON MY SHIRT.

I guess I have to be okay with things like that now, right?

UH OH!!

My sisters, cousins and I had a craft day at my cousin's house last month. It was crazy. We played with her Cricut and made pretty little things. I found myself wrestling with the idea of saving up for one of these babies, but decided that I'd just wish for one from afar. The cartridges are pretty expensive, so I figured I'd just make myself become extra handy with a good old pair of scissors or something.

Then today, I learned about this.

I'm in trouble.

Cityline

There isn't much on TV these days, especially during the day. Reruns of reruns of reruns. I need to crack open a book, seriously.

I'm watching Cityline right now, and Sandra Pittana is on. She drives me crazy. Sometimes when I see her on the show, I wanna take duct tape and tape her mouth shut. I apologize for the hostility. It's also got to do with the fact that she almost hit me with her car. ("Almost" as in missed me by about 5 cm.)

Seriously, she did. She was on her phone about to make a right turn into my face. When she realized that she almost hit me, she sorta just stared at me, shocked. And then I just stared at her back, wanting her to remember my face so that she'd never talk on her phone and drive again. And then I continued crossing the street to my doctor's office.

So you can understand why I'm planning to change the channel.

Next time

G20 dreams

I've been having G20-related nightmares. For those living in Toronto, you know how crazy things are expected to get here. I actually got invited to rally...I politely declined. Everyone I know is avoiding downtown Toronto. People who work downtown are either working from home or working off-site.

Mr.S has to go into work. His office is just outside the zone. I've been scared for weeks. I have no idea what exactly it is that I'm scared of, but I've been scared.

And so, I've been having nightmares. They're not really stretched out scary dreams, they're more like flashes of scary scenes. A flash of a crowd screaming. A flash of deserted city. A flash of collapsing buildings. A flash of people storming a guarded room. A flash of a bomb timer.

That last one was just this morning. I could hear the beeping of the timer and I was able to force myself to wake up, only to still hear the beeping while my eyes were open. I freaked out. I turned over frantically to see my husband missing from our bed. I yelled for him, covering D-nut's ears as he slept. Turns out, Mr.S forgot to turn off his morning alarm after pressing snooze several times, and so the clock was what was actually beeping.

Gah!!!! When this weekend is over, it'll be sweet dreams for me.

September 21, 2010

WAKE UP!
John Legend + The Roots

Worrywart

I don't think I'm one to worry. Usually. And then I became a mother. Not just that. I became a NEW mother. There is a difference.

Experienced mothers across the globe would secretly giggle at me and the things I worry about. What can I say? This is all new to me even though I have 13+ nephews and nieces. It's amazing how little information you have about the most minor things that happen in an infant's life. My husband spent the first few weeks worrying about every little thing. You should have seen him when he saw our son's Mongolian spots. Even now, he doesn't like them and I think he isn't completely convinced they're normal and harmless. His face was priceless when he saw meconium too.

It's all a learning experience, I guess, right? You learn from the first one and then don't worry so much with the ones that follow. I just feel silly worrying all the time.

Hungabunga

Turns out Wild Wing is coming out with a chain of burger joints. Enter: Pink Burger.

Coming soon...in Aurora.

Womp. Womp.

Accessorizing the Saggy

I feel like my boobs are becoming saggy. I don't know if they actually are, but I feel like it. If I had a lot of money, I'd pretty-up the what-seems-like-growing gap between my neck and my cleavage with pretty necklaces from Anthropologie.

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I'm up

It's Friday night. I'm awake at 12:26AM, and not because my son is keeping me up. In fact, he and my husband are fast asleep in bed behind me. I can't sleep.

I had been on the road just over an hour ago, and these days, I'm doing a lot of driving. Most of the time it's just me, my son and my mind occupying the car. On many trips, my mind ends up hogging a lot of the space. I have a lot of time to think.

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At the mall

I live at the mall. Not any specific one, just the mall in general. Before D-nut was around people were telling me that I'd be hanging out at the mall a lot. I get it now. It breaks the monotony of being at home all day or the usual going for walks in the afternoon (lately it's been too hot for walks). It also just so happens that we have stuff to buy at the mall so it's not like I'm just being a mallrat.

Malls these days are very baby-mommy friendly, which is a very good thing. There are areas to nurse, microwaves for bottle warming, plenty of change tables in washrooms around the mall and family washrooms for when you've gotta pee too. You should see the teeny tiny toilets in some of the family washrooms. So cute!

Ooops!

Sorry for my brief disappearance. My son has become even more fun to play with these days and so I've been busy, yes, PLAYING.

I'll have posts up shortly!!

Toy sale

I feel like a full-fledged mom. Last week, my sister (along with her little guy and Day-zle) introduced me to the world of toy warehouse sales. It was quite fun and I admit, a little overwhelming. I didn't realize how out of touch I am with the universe of toys. Actually, I don't think I was ever really in touch with it. I wasn't much of a toy lover when I was a kid. I think I was one of those rare kids who wanted clothes for gifts, but had a select few toys that really appealed to me...that, and whatever looked good in the Consumers Distributing catalog ;)

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Mother's Day

It was a goodie.

How funny is this?

I've written recently about my two favourite shows of all time. I then saw this during one of my Ally marathons and found myself laughing out loud.

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The Lazarus Effect

I took a huge interest in HIV and AIDS in my third year of university. I took a Sociology and AIDS course and learned so much about the disease and the stigma around it, and it seems, I was forever changed. At first, I decided to take the course because I thought it was a good mix for the three fields I was studying -- Sociology, Biology and Zoology. It turned out to be more than that.

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The End

Warning: I'm totally being melodramatic but if you're a Lostie, you'll understand.

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Another Ally

...er, well, Allison...Janney.

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Ally McBeal

I got the box set of all the Ally McBeal episodes (and more!) for Christmas from Mr.S. Ally McBeal is my most favouritest show of all time (right up there with LOST, but for totally different reasons).

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Twenty-eight

I am now 28 years old.

Not two years to 30.

Not 7 years from internationally legal.

Not careening downhill to my doom.

Not ahead or behind schedule.

I'm perfectly 28.

And, it was a perfect day.

Low-key.

With the man and boy.

Good morning Momma. Fish tacos. Club.

Kisses@lunch. White chocolate brownie. WCB MASSACRE.

28 in chocolate. Our baby boy&me. McHappy Day dinner.

Paul's gift. BOP IT!...? High scorer + D-nut.

Dance it! Likklekakes. Us.

Thoughts on Mommyhood - The first scare

Being a mother is hard work. While there are definitely rewards and more sweet moments than I can count, the tough times that are really draining. I learned that this past week.

D-nut got his first round of immunizations last week. He didn't freak out when he got the two shots, nor did he have any fever or strange side effects, but he did become inconsolable after he woke up from the nap that began on the ride home from the doctor. Poor guy. I heard a whole other kind of cry and it just broke my heart. It was so sad to see him be so upset and not have much to comfort him with other than feeding and Tempra...both of which worked. He was a-ok the day after.

Then this weekend, we had quite possibly the most emotionally draining and terrifying experience of our lives thus far.

Scared.
Sad.
Frustrated.
Worried.
Confused.

All understatements, but the best words to describe it.

As a new mother in completely foreign territory, I found myself trying to put on the bravest face, meanwhile trying my hardest not to completely lose it, become useless and fall to my knees and beg God for mercy (which I did anyway). We prayed all day, prayers for help, for strength, for courage and patience and then surrender to His will. Tough stuff. I once heard that a mother's prayer for her child is the strongest prayer there is. I wasn't about to deny that.

There were also tears, lots of them and at first I felt like maybe I should stop crying so much. Then I realized: who says tears are signs of weakness, of giving up? I can cry because I'm scared and worried but still be hopeful and faithful that he's fine. I can cry with my husband for our son and it's okay.

I dreaded this day, the day when my first child would have his first scary experience, likely more scary for his parents than for him. It's so upsetting to not know what exactly is wrong and not be able to get clarification from him. Ugh. What was baffling was that he seemed totally fine, totally himself.

It turned out he was fine, no harm done and nothing to worry about. All the hours spent with my family in waiting rooms, in examination rooms, holding him until my arms felt like they were gonna give...all worth it just to hear he was okay.

Phew.

We love her...

My First Run...as a Mom...officially!

I just finished my first run as an official mom (i.e. with the baby out of my womb). By the way, I've cooled down, stretched and showered, in case you were thinking me gross for blogging all sweaty and nasty.

I feel good.

I feel energized.

I feel different...as in, different from what I usually feel like after a run.

I haven't run in months...

The last time I ran, I was pregnant and very cautious, naturally. As I said before...way back in October, I found it quite challenging to pace myself, to keep myself from going beyond what I last did. Instead of challenging myself to go faster, go farther, I had to challenge myself to go slower, stay nearer. My thoughts were often "Should I be doing this? Is the baby okay? Does he mind all the movement? Should I stop? Slow down. Dang, I feel heavy..." While my doctor said things were fine and that the exercise is good for the baby, I still had those thoughts.

This morning was great.

I had been building up to today since I got the OKAY! from my doctor on Wednesday to GO GO GO! at my first appointment since I gave birth. When she asked if I had any questions, my first question was not about breastfeeding, sex, stitches, bowel movements or anything like most women ask (according to my doctor). My first question was "Can I start running again?" To which she replied, "Oh yeah, GO!! You're definitely good to go." To be honest, after I got that green light, I forgot most of the questions I had been meaning to ask. And so, since Wednesday, I had been clawing for Saturday morning, this morning, for my run. I would feed D-nut and go after one of his morning feedings. And that I did.

While I felt a little guilty and selfish leaving him, I knew he'd be okay with his Poppa and it's not like I'd be abandoning him or something. I'd be right back! It's a funny thing to remember that he is not my life and so my life should not revolve around him, as much as he does need me. And so after quick goodbyes (because if they were any longer, I would not step out the door, which is pretty much half the effort of going for a run or any form of exercise...you have to show up), I set out on my "Maiden Mom Run". I stepped out the door and realized I hadn't seen the front of our house in nearly 2 months. Oh my goodness. (I've been leaving the house through our garage which is on the other side of the house...I haven't been a hermit.)

I was off. Not as in "off to run"; my body was off. Things did not move as smoothly as they once did. I felt heavy and I felt like I needed someone to tend to my joints with an oil can. I also realized that my doctor wasn't joking when she said to make sure I get a good sports bra. For the first time I wondered about nipple chafing. Ew. I chose to wear my "race bra". It's a really good sports bra that I reserve for races because I think it makes me run better. (It probably doesn't.) I needed more support than that. But man, did I feel good! And after around 500m, this Stella started getting her groove back. It sorta felt like my muscles and my joints were remembering the movements.

And so, when things were back to normal, I was left alone with the rhythm of my feet pounding the pavement and my thoughts...which focussed on my son. "My son"...whoa. I felt so happy! I thought of his face, his little hands and feet, his growing belly and thighs, the faces he makes when he's in a playful mood, our new game of what I call "Kissy Face"...and then I found myself running pretty fast. I don't know if it was additional motivation or the need to run home so I could play with him.

But I did get home faster...and I did play with him.

I'm a running mom!

(Taken post-maiden mom run...sweaty and nasty.)

Life Changes and Girlfriends

One of my BGFs is in town right now. Every time she comes home, it's like a mini reunion, only, it never feels like she's been gone. We never skip a beat. At the same time, every time she comes home, we BGFs all play a game of catch up, and we always have something new to share.

This particular return home has been a while since her last return and things have changed quite a bit. She said something the other day that inspired this post. We were leaving a restaurant and she had been the last one to exit. She was looking for us and noticed us outside the doors already. Her thought was, "Are those my girlfriends?" She saw three grown up women and a stroller. "Yep, those are my girlfriends."

We used to be a bunch of goody-two-shoeses in crisp white dress shirts and kilts. And now here we are.

We went out again tonight and I'm feeling quite high. I admit, before D-nut was born, I felt a little bit sad at the thought that having a baby would change the way things were with my girlfriends. I thought I'd be giving up a lot of time with them, that maybe eventually we'd end up going on distantly with each other until they had kids and we were all back on the same stepping stone of life. That hasn't happened, and I'm so happy.

Tonight, our table had space for a stroller. Where we were didn't have a change table in the washroom. My girlfriends helped me change my baby's diaper by shielding off the rest of the world so that I could wipe my baby's poo in private. They lovingly doted on my son. Then they walked me and my son to our car.

What a wonderful set of girlfriends and a splendid set of aunts.

A Some Day moment

I have absolutely no green thumb. I have no plants in my possession because, well, they died. The herbs I buy and plant every summer die before I get really good use out of them. The trees I attempted to grow twice from our wedding did not survive. We have several left that are frozen and I'm reluctant to plant them.

But some day, I'd like to grow my own garden of pretty flowers, plus herbs and vegetables. Nothing huge or crazy, just something simple where I can just go outside and grab some fresh tomatoes and basil...and some lilies of the valley to pretty things up. Or something.

Thoughts on Mommyhood - Poo

Like I said, boys pee on everything.

I learned this weekend that they poo on everything too.

Mr.S has already been pooed on several times. One time, while he was changing his diaper, Mr.d (who I think I'll refer to from now on as D-nut, [like peanut] which is what we've been lovingly calling him at home) "sharted" (if you don't know what that means, click on the link), with a little more "sh" than "art", right at the point in the diaper change where there is no diaper covering his arsehole. Mr.S walked back into our bedroom with crap sprayed all over his t-shirt. (It was hilarious, I have to say.) Luckily, it was an old hole-ridden t-shirt, (what's with men being okay with wearing things out until they have holes in them and STILL wearing them?!) so he just [finally] threw it out.

This weekend though was a whole other level of poo disaster.

D-nut has managed to learn to poo OUTSIDE his diaper. We were at a birthday party yesterday and while Mr.S was holding him, he felt that his sock was wet. So he went to go change him. I didn't see my boys for half an hour. I went to go see if maybe they had decided to hang out elsewhere. Turned out, Mr.S had been cleaning up a poo mess the entire time. Yes, D-nut had pooed so much, it reached his socks. Somehow he got the diaper AND the outside of the diaper...AND outside the diaper shirt.

This weekend, he did it 3 times. One of the times, he almost entirely cleared the diaper, and it's not like he had a wedgie or anything.

Oh crap. Literally.

Coos, Waas, Baas, Poots

I'm still trying to believe the sounds of the newest track on my life's soundtrack. They're so sweet.

Old Spice

I am not a fan of Old Spice. My brother started using Old Spice deodorant when I was in my first trimester and the smell triggered my nausea. Most smells' strength faded as time went on, but the smell of his deodorant made me feel sick throughout the pregnancy. And then I had the baby and the smell still bugged me. (It was like he bought the tube at Costco or something. It was so big.) So I realized I just didn't like the smell in general. I'm sure they have a bunch of other scents that are more likable. Thankfully, he recently finished his stick and has moved on to another scent (and another brand too, I think?).

Bad scents aside, I particularly enjoy the Old Spice commercials...

And then, there are the Terry Crews Old Spice commercials. These are CRAZY! Enjoy!

(You might wanna go pee first before you press play.)